February 21, 2016

KO's Ringside Notes & Quotes XII — What Will The "Fury Era" Look Like?

Hughie, Lewis, and the New
By Jeffrey Freeman, KO Digest

What kind of world heavyweight champion will Tyson Fury be? Will he be like Leon Spinks, remembered most for upsetting an all-time great heavyweight champion and then losing the title right back to him in an immediate rematch? Or will he be like Michael Spinks by winning the Wladimir Klitschko rematch (by boring decision) and then getting blasted out by American Deontay Wilder? Will Fury be like his namesake, Mike Tyson, a devastating champion (for a while) but one who gets knocked out in a huge upset for the title? 

Perhaps Fury will be like "Buster" Douglas, a one-hit, upset wonder, and then KO by 3 David Haye in his very next fight? Or will he be like Larry Holmes and go on to a lengthy reign with nearly 20 title defenses? Come to think of it, if that's Fury's destiny, he also then follows in the footsteps of the man he beat. Speaking of Klitschko, will Fury be like Wladimir, not even the best Fury in the family? Could Hughie be his Vitali? Or will Fury be like Muhammad Ali, a global (albeit controversial) boxing superstar with a mouth that people pay (and pay again) to see get shut? Or maybe Fury will be like Lennox Lewis, the last heavyweight champion from the United Kingdom, a damn good champ whose chin occasionally lets him down? 

Triple G
Knockout Artist — It's been almost 8 years since a professional prizefighter of any kind has gone the distance with World Middleweight Champion Gennady Golovkin. The date was June 21, 2008. The place was Br√łndby Hall in Denmark. The opponent was a Frenchman named Amar Amari. By some stroke of divine intervention, Amari was able to go the 8 round distance with a then 12-0 GGG despite the fact that in 27 pro bouts, Amari was stopped not once or twice but FIVE times. Amari fought only thrice more after his 15 minutes of fame, winning one of three (all 3X by decision) before disappearing from the sport only to become "famous" later for not getting knocked out by the hardest puncher he ever faced.

Deutschland Raub — If Felix Sturm won another ABC middleweight title at home in the deep dark woods of Germany but nobody was there to care about the bad decision, would his victory make a sound? That's what happened 2/20/16 when Sturm defeated Fedor Chudinov by dodgy decision for the WBA 168 lb. "super" title. The year 2004 was a long time ago but that's when Sturm had his most meaningful bout, a controversial decision loss to future Hall of Famer Oscar De La Hoya. Everybody knows Sturm beat the "Golden Boy" but that's boxing politics. Sturm's boxing record is now littered with so many ripoffs, it's hard to keep track of when he was the victim and/or when he was the beneficiary of a robbery.

And we wonder why people don't follow boxing like they used to. They can't.

About Bigmouths
No Problem Fool — The just announced ‪#‎BronerTheophane‬ ‪#‎PBC‬ fight on April Fools Day in Washington D.C. interests me for no other reason than to hear these two fighters talk some good old fashioned USA vs. UK trash. I can't speak to the fight itself. It's an odd pairing. I pity the fool who cares too much about it. But the promotion should be fun for me as a boxing writer. Both of these 140 pound egomaniacs posses the gift of gab. That's another way of saying they each have huge pieholes. How huge? The late great Morton Downey Jr. ain't got nothing on either of these bigmouths. Broner's yap is well known. I got an earful of Theophane during media activities for his 2013 loss to Pablo Cesar Cano on the ‪#‎MayweatherCanelo‬ undercard. I actually liked what I heard, wanted to hear more, and think you probably will too. KO's real question is, will AB and Ashley talk better than they fight? We'll all know the answer soon enough.

Do you see what I see Tommy?
Illegal U Turn — Recently re-retired Boston bad boy Danny "Dropkick" O'Connor and members of the New York Police Department now have something in common. Both have been beaten up by "light punching" Brooklyn Brawler Gabriel "Tito" Bracero. Last October in Lowell, Mass, Bracero did a beatdown job on Danny in 41 seconds flat that sent O'Connor straight to the hospital. 

It was reported by the New York Post that Bracero allegedly put the proverbial boots to some NY boys in blue after they pulled "Tito" over for driving while punch drunk on his way home from a marijuana dispensary. Bracero, whose criminal rap sheet is as long as Deontay Wilder's jab, has been overcharged with a litany of other minor offenses. Where Bracero goes from here is up in the air like smoke.  

Tappin' Out Like Father Like Daughter — When the hottest thing about "ultimate" cage fighting is that their over-hyped and totally exposed media creation Ronda Rousey supposedly thought about killing herself after a KO loss to a talented boxer named Holly Holm, well folks, that's a dying "sport" that can't kick the bucket fast enough as far as I'm concerned. Boxing wins. Human cockfighting loses. 

CANELO VS. GGG better be next
Middleweight Dominic Wade
 

Ten Facts About GGG's Next Opponent: 

1. "The Blade" is 18-0 with 12 knockouts.
2. He's 25 years old from Maryland, USA.
3. Was trained by the respected Barry Hunter.
4. He beat the underrated Dashon Johnson.
5. Decisioned Sam Soliman to earn his shot.
6. Is the I.B.F. #1 mandatory middleweight.
7. Pro debut in 2009, was inactive in 2012.
8. Beat Edwin Rodriguez in the amateurs.
9. Signed with PBC big boss Al Haymon.
10. 100-1 underdog against ‪#‎GGG‬ 4/23.

February 9, 2016

KO's Ringside Notes & Quotes XI — The KOD Kayfabe Knockout Edition

Like a kick in the nuts
If pro wrestling was "real" I'd write more "spoof" stories like this one:

Vince McMahon Declares: ‘Bret Gave Bret Prostate Cancer!

By Freeman 'The Fabulous' Freebird

Stamford, Connecticut — The world reacted to the terrible news with compassion and sympathy. But as wrestling fans the world over know, WWE owner Vince McMahon is neither compassionate nor sympathetic.

When word of Bret Hart's cancer diagnosis reached McMahon via social media last week just hours after Hart's heartfelt posting was shared online by McMahon's son-in-law Paul "Triple H" Levesque following another grueling (but successful) WWE world title defense, the stone cold boss of World Wrestling Entertainment had this to say about the "Hitman" he so infamously screwjobbed in Montreal: "I have not, nor will I ever forgive Bret Hart for spitting that disgusting, non-gimmicked loogie in my face. Some of it even dripped into my mouth. Look, I'm sorry that Bret screwed up his own prostate by insisting on the Sharpshooter as his finishing maneuver. I tried to warn him many, many times that it would have long-term health consequences for his bread basket but he refused to listen to me or to the 'Heartbreak Kid' Shawn Michaels."

RIP Rowdy Roddy
"I have no sympathy whatsoever for Bret," re-emphasized McMahon from his family compound.  

"Bret has always done whatever the hell Bret wanted to do and now it's time for him to pay the piper," bellowed a rowdy McMahon from the pit of his stomach. Asked by this reporter if he or the WWE bears any responsibility for Hart's present condition, McMahon grew angry and adamant while steroid filled veins bulged from his 80 year-old chicken neck: "As an excellent sports entertainment executor, I am the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be. The truth is that Bret gave Bret prostate cancer by being such a world class championship dick!"

"Nobody ever kicked out of Mr. Perfect's Perfect-Plex but I did," Tweeted Bret from treatment. 

"I can pin cancer, stage one, two, three," #HashtagHart promised his loyal, sunglass wearing fans.

Mexican Style 
Hashtag Khanelo — The recent Golden Boy Promotion announcement of ‪#‎CaneloKhan‬ for May 7 seemed to come out of nowhere. I was as surprised as anybody to find out that "world middleweight champion" Saul Canelo Alvarez would be defending his newly won Ring Magazine and WBC 155 pound catchweight titles for the first time against a chinny welterweight with two knockout losses at the hands of super lightweights.

This must be what newly sober promoter Oscar De La Hoya calls "marination" for a fall (down) match-up with wrecking ball Gennady Golovkin. I'll believe it only when I see it in the ring. Don't expect that unification super-fight to come out of nowhere. Expect it to go nowhere. Fast. Like a few other boxing "dream fights" that fight fans won't be seeing anytime soon, ‪#‎GGGCanelo‬ doesn't make enough dollars or enough sense to the hombres who control Canelo and who make mucho dinero off their red-headed Mexican star.

Show Me State — The first time I got a live look at future IBF heavyweight champion of the world Charles "Missouri" Martin, it was on a ridiculously hot summer day in July of 2013 at Rockingham Park in Salem, NH. I was ringside to cover the ESPN Friday Night Fights card for KO Digest. Martin stopped somebody named Aaron Kinch in four rounds on the non-televised undercard. More than anything Martin did in the ring, I couldn't help but notice his trainer Henry Tillman of Mike Tyson fame. Notably older and heavier, I barely recognized Tillman but it was nice to see him in the "Live Free or Die" state. Hank Lundy beat Ajose Olusegun in the main event and "Polish Prince" Ryan Kielczewski scored a sensational knockout of Miguel Sosa. On this night, Marlon Hayes made more of an impression (in defeat against Alexis Santos) than Martin ever did in victory. Today, Martin's a "world champion" in the resurgent post-Klit heavyweight division.

The Son of God before resurrection
Super middleweight Darnell "Deezol" Boone talks to the KO Digest about the experience of fighting (and knocking down) a young Andre Ward in a six round decision loss in 2005 — "I said “I want to fight this guy. I can beat him.” No sooner did I say that, two or three months later it came about. I knew I could beat this dude. I believe I beat him, everybody that was there thought I beat him, and he knew I beat him. Ward was hurt with an uppercut, straight right hand. The referee gave him a delayed count, he got up, and he stayed away from me. First three rounds, he won slightly. Second three I win, then I won the fight with the knockdown but you know how boxing politics are." 

The late, great, cigar chompin' Boxing Hall of Fame writing hero Bert Randolph Sugar held cage fighting in contempt — "It's really just bad boxing combined with one guy sitting on top of another guy, punching him in the face. Where's the martial part? Where are the arts?"

They're in the professional wrestling ring Bert. 

By Jeffrey Freeman, KO Digest